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John Foxxworthy [Mar. 7th, 2004|07:18 pm]


[music |John Foxx- "Systems of Romance"]


[A man bearing a strong facial resemblance to John Foxx walks on stage. He's wearing a nondescript gray suit...and cowboy boots. His hair is graying save for a dark brown mullet on the back of his head. He speaks in a high-pitched Tennessee accent and addresses a welcoming audience.]

JOHN FOXXWORTHY: Now, a lot of y'all spot me on the street in my nondescript anonymous gray suit and ask, "Hey, John, how do I know if I'm a quiet man?" Well, I've broken it down for ya here and now...

If the Michelangelo layers of living figures and random architecture are displayed [adds emphasis] on a screen of water...you might be a quiet man.

[The audience laughs uproariously.]

If the city eases you through and absorbs you through your [adds emphasis] clothing [the audience starts laughing in anticipation]...you might be a quiet man.

[more laughing.]

OK, one more...["awwws" from the audience] If the streets [John starts laughing, but catches himself much to the delight of the audience]...if the streets open out into a piazza with a huge fountain at the center and worn marble figures [adds emphasis] tangle in the cascade [uproarious laughter in anticipation]...you might be a quiet man.

[He bows, runs backstage and kisses his wife.]

[User Picture]From: a_lad_inane
2004-03-09 05:45 pm (UTC)

Behind this androgynous visage, I'm more beauti-fecal.

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From: purpleside
2004-03-10 05:01 am (UTC)
steve strange's stolen teletubby is beauti-fecal.

some say the ugly make up for it with personality, i think the attractive always have personality to start with and charisma to boot, so the bias is in your favour.

hush, before the adoring masses figure out you wear eyeliner.
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